5 Reasons Why I Hate October

There are twelve months in the year; 365 days. However, there are 31 consecutive days that I absolutely hate. Yes I realize hate is a strong word, and I think it adequately describes my detest of October.

  1. Experiment: type October into google images and what comes up? Who care's! It's all orange. ORANGE! ORANGE!!!! Of all the colours in the world, all the shades within the spectrum, orange is the ugliest colour of them all. I'm sorry to all of you who think orange is a phenomenal colour, but you're wrong. Orange is the colour that we all avoid. Have you ever seen someone and said "Hey! I love your orange shirt!!". No, you haven't. Having previously working in Price Chopper where the store colours were orange and blue, you already have a strong detest for that colour. But seriously, name something "good" that is orange... can't think of anything? Neither can I. And to make matters worse, orange cannot be paired with anything without having *negative* connotations. Orange and Green: you look like a pumpkin. Orange and Black: you're too eager for Halloween. Orange and Blue: Price Chopper. Orange and anything: ugly.
  2. If you actually did the google images experiment, you see a bunch of pictures of pumpkins. No I don't have anything against pumpkins, but "Jack-o-lanterns", yes I have a problem with you. First of all, WHAT A WASTE OF PUMPKIN!!! You spend good money ($2.99 this week at FreshCo) for a decent sized squash, and what do you do with it? You throw out all the insides, you know the part that's meant for eating, and keep the outer shell! The shell - the part that is completely useless! And then you have the audacity to carve "cute" little faces in the pumpkin. That is so much wasted effort. You don't carve faces into bananas or apples, so why are we defacing the poor pumpkin. What a total waste of time, money and pumpkin. Oh, and pumpkins stink... just sayin'.
  3. My third reason can get me into a bit of trouble. But I actually hate Halloween (and no, hate is not strong enough to describe it). My parents, thank the LORD, did not subject me to this stupid practise of begging. Yes, I had my share of dress up as a child, it was my favourite game, but this "Halloween" thing, didn't exist in my childhood. First of all it teaches your children begging and greed. They go door to door demanding candy from neighbours ("trick or treat" really means, give me candy or don't waste my time. No one wants a treat). Then it turns into a competition of greed and hoarding, who can get the most candy. I've always gotten my share of snack-sized candy and mini bags of chips that last no longer than a week during October, but I've never had to do this door-to-door soliciting for it. And I don't know about you, but I don't like being scared. I don't like bats or spiders or vampires and all that other nonsense. I don't like the dark. And I don't like orange. All of the uglinesses that October and Halloween in compass.
  4. Yes, I agree that the leaves changing colour is pretty (it's the only adjective I can think of), but it's a lot of work. I wasn't that kid who loved to jump in the leaves, because on what would have been my first experience of leave jumping, there was a truck load of bugs in our pile of leaves! After that, heck-to-the-no! But once you grow up, you can't enjoy those types of things anyway. Growing up means you have to rake those pretty leaves. So much work! And it always seems to come out of nowhere. You leave work and all is nice, come home and its the leafpocalypse. Didn't see that one coming did ya...
  5. Once October 1st rolls around you know summer is over and we're on the downward spiral to winter. I live in Canada. Winter is cold. I don't like it. Once October rolls around, the sun seems to peace out, nasty cold air rushes in, and this year, it rains- all.the.time! After the rain goes away, we always get a few days of nice weather and then BAM. snow... Ugh! Then the countdown begins till summer.
There are a plethora of additional reasons as to why I hate October. Every October first, I think "30 days till we put up our Christmas tree... how many days till Christmas". But it all comes down to this... October is awful because of ORANGE!!! UGH!


1 comment

Ken Breadner November 16, 2011 at 5:14 PM

Devonnie, October is and always has been my favourite month, mostly for your last point. It means summer is over. I don't have to worry about losing half my body weight in sweat every time I step out of the house. This can not be anything other than a good thing.

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